Bulletin Boards

Day 1: I've decided that if there is ever a job opening for professional bulletin board maker, that I should not apply! My computer hasn't been set up yet so getting the paperwork part of my new job as the Speech-Language Pathologist at an elementary school was seemingly impossible. So today I dove into the task of decorating my bulletin boards instead.

A simple task, right? Pick out some different colored paper, grab a stapler and some scissors and away we go. Yeah... right! What a mess I made!

My big bulletin board is up pretty high so I had to stand on a chair to be able to measure the board. Instead of using the meter stick that was sitting on my desk, I decided it would be a bright idea to just hold the paper at the top and then unroll it to the right length and then "Voila!", it's done! Nope, I'm not that lucky, or smart! I ended up dropping the roll and watching it tumble to the floor as I stand up the chair empty-handed. I decide to just eyeball the measurements due to my already extreme frustration and pray for the best. My scissors didn't glide down the paper like the glide down wrapping paper to create a nice, smooth edge. Instead, it looked as if a two year old took a pair of scissors to it.

I finally get the huge piece of paper back up to the board and get ready to staple it. I eyeball it again and "line it up". I smack the stapler on one corner and then other and I feel quite satisfied that I finally got this bright orange piece of paper to hang up! I step back to admire my work and alas... it's crooked! Of course it is! Just my luck! So I take the staple out of one corner and then the other and line it up again. This time I'm sure I got it right! I step back and finally success overwhelms me!

But those jagged edges are killing me and they look horrible! I have no "borders" to put up so I have got to make it look good! So I try and "glide the scissors along the edge like a razor blade to clean up the edges. Not a good idea. It worked, to some extent, but it was not a good idea. Now it looks even worse. I decided to give up and move on to the next piece. This one needed two orange pieces because the paper wasn't wide enough. So I try again with the scissors. No luck. I'm still a two year old trapped inside a twenty-six year old's body! I decide to still use the paper because it's long enough and wide enough so why not? Seriously, I SUCK at putting up bulletin boards. It ended up crooked and a really big mess, again. I had to use scraps to fill in the holes that I couldn't get covered up due to my huge lack of visual perception at this point in my life.

*On a side note, I went to the dollar store and found some really cute "borders" today so I'll get to cover up those horrible jagged edges tomorrow!*

I just had to walk away. I went and got more staples. God knows I used a whole "stick" of staples for one bulletin board.

I threw away the rest of the scraps and took a deep breath as I looked up at the three remaining beasts that I had yet to conquer. I kicked off my shoes, rolled up my pretend sleeves and rubbed my hands together, ready to tackle the job (Okay, not really, but it adds a nice touch to the story)! Scissors in hand, I tried again with the cutting. This time, on blue paper. And... it liked me!!! The sound of the scissors gliding across the paper reminded me of Christmas and presents and I was so unbelievably happy! I decided that I would fold down the edges before putting it up on the bulletin board to make a cleaner, neater look. I cranked out three bulletin boards in the time it took me to do one! I was more proud of myself than my parents were when I graduated from my graduate school! Maybe I can be a professional bulletin board maker after all! Oh, the excitement! How much do you think they make?

Anyway, now as I look back on the past 20 minutes, I realize that this task really had a bigger impact on me that I thought. I mean I just wrote a blog entry on bulletin boards! It's going to be a good year! I just know it!

In the words of Winston Churchill:

"Never give in--never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy."